What’s a TV geek without TV?: My experiment with not having cable

In my apartment reboot, one of the things that ate shit was my Dish TV. (Long story that involved not being able to close doors anymore due to my new floors being thicker than shitty apartment carpet.)

I was all too hasty in canceling my Dish subscription (sorry to the four people I left stranded without an HBOGO login on the night of the Game of Thrones finale!). My plan was to get ATT Uverse, but… turns out, the website lied, and Uverse isn’t available in my ‘hood (despite it being available 1 mile away!?). They can offer me DirecTV — but I’m not willing to sign a two year contract, because I’m not willing to admit that I’ll still be living in this same apartment in two years. And long ago I swore to NEVER get Time Warner Cable again.

Then I thought, ‘most of my friends have no cable TV whatsoever, maybe I could pull that off too? I’m young and hip… ish.’

So I got Amazon Fire TV, and challenged myself to live without cable TV.

It’s… not been going well. Read More

Could this unicorn umbrella be the answer to Los Angeles’ drought?

unicorn umbrella

I haven’t owned an umbrella since… wait — I don’t think I’ve EVER owned an umbrella. Umbrella ownership is pretty optional in Los Angeles. But it’s been raining on and off for the past couple of days. (Even thundering! Of course, I missed most of the opportunity to enjoy the rare thunder storm, as I assumed it was the noise of the landscapers’ wheelbarrows being pushed down a driveway. Was that the most LA thing I’ve ever said?)

What a coincidence that Think Geek just released the Magical Unicorn Umbrella! This could possibly be the first umbrella I ever own. Is it not a thing a beauty?

Of course, with my weather luck, the moment I purchase it Los Angeles will never see rain again in my life time. UNLESS… with a little magical unicorn power, maybe this umbrella could herald the rumored El Nino rains???

What do you think guys, should I buy this as an early birthday present to myself? Or will it just sit there, unused and be a reminder of how LA is drying up into a barren wasteland?

Death, drama, and dating: The only time my awesome job sucks

This dead cockaroach is saying what I was thinking last night.

Do you know what’s bound to happen the moment I go on a date, my editor Catherine goes to a movie, and my boss Ariel is on vacation with ZERO data on her phone and no internet connection? The post that went viral all day long yesterday — the one that had (miraculously) no drama for the amount of traffic it was bringing in, lulling us into a feeling of internet stranger security — will absolutely erupt in controversy.

Or as a friend of mine put it: “What a surreal world when you’re like ‘excuse me dinner date but I’m not sure if this bride’s husband really died, and I have to go handle the unfolding Australian drama.’ Very few people said that sentence last night you know. ;)”

As part of my job, I wrote about the whole Offbeat Bride commentroversy/drama over on Offbeat Empire. Check it out if you want a dose of internet WTF-ery.

How to maintain a minimalist bohemian bedroom in both decor and lifestyle

Over on Offbeat Home, I showed off some of my minimalist bedroom inspiration from a real estate listing. One of my wonderful Homies asked to know more about my actual bedroom. So here it is (keep in mind that it’s still a work in progress)…

minimalist bohemian bedroom

How to achieve this look:

Read More

Celebrating my love of insane TV in the Black Milk Stay Tuned skirt

black milk color bar skirt

The moment I saw the Black Milk Stay Tuned skirt I knew I had to have it. I didn’t know where or when the hell I’d wear it (probably a convention). But I’m such a huge TV nerd that this limited edition piece just had to be mine.

Then it just hung there — being the lone rainbow in the sea of black, grey, and dragon leggings that is my closet — until I was invited to (okay, maybe possibly had some hand in inspiring) “Carnal Desire, the collected works of Philip S Wilson.” It was a live reading of the most hilariously unsexy “skinemax” scripts ever written, and it was one of the best things that I’ve ever had happen in front of my face. (More on that amazingness over here.)

This is what a soft core erotica reading looks like. Sexy, huh?

This is what a soft core erotica reading looks like. Sexy, huh?

I mean… what better way to celebrate your love of insane soft core TV than with this outfit: Read More

And then there were two: Returning to the original cast

My ex-husband took Peezu, shattering my heart into a million pieces that are all piercing my innards with every breath I take.

Documenting my last moments of Peezu cuddles.

The other morning was the first morning that I awoke and didn’t have to rush out of bed to walk a dog. While it was nice to be able to wake up naturally and linger in bed for a while, it also felt so strange. I naturally felt anxiety about taking Peezu out, even though I knew she wasn’t even there for me to feel anxious about. I wonder how long this feeling of needing to care for a beast who isn’t even there will linger, like a phantom limb.

I do really miss the old animal gang. I miss having a crazy home full of wild beasts, I miss caring for them, and I even miss their stupid barks sometimes… only sometimes.

When I come home now I still expect to hear the pitter patter of little Peezu claws, as she wiggles excitedly down the hall towards me. I often brace myself to hear Jackson’s loud guard bark when my neighbor opens his creaky security gate.

the woogs and me

But the reality is that my old family is gone — the husband and two dogs — and now it’s just me and my cat. I call us “the original cast,” because before there was ever a husband or a dog, there was The Woogs and me.

I will now admit something that I feel guilty about… (lean in while I whisper it in your ear…) Read More

My temporary, and possibly dangerous, translucent coffee table situation

my living room

Can you see the coffee table in this photo? Just barely right? Yeah, me too. Constantly.

That barely visible coffee table situation is actually the Top Stage Clear Acrylic Nesting Lucite Side Table Set arranged in a semi-circle, on this too-small-but-passable jute rug.

Clear Acrylic Nesting Table Coffee

Both of these — because of their dinky-ness and their ability to completely disappear from my vision enough for me to forget they’re there and then continuously get scared by the shiny appearance of a translucent table at my feet — are going to be just temporary. I’m eventually going to have to get a bigger rug, and then I’m thinking the translucent tables are DEFINITELY going to look too small for the space.

acrylic coffee table

But… as the days go by, I’m growing quite fond of my weird coffee table situation — shiny table-induced heart jumps aside