My furry crack pipe: Why Geraldo Rivera can fucking suck it

Jackson and me.

Few things make me angrier than someone fucking with my dog. I’m like that mom that miraculously developed superhuman strength to lift up a car when her child was pinned underneath it, when it comes to loving my dog, Jackson. And when someone (namely one mustachioed douche bag reporter) comes out with a generalized negative outlook on my pets breed, the pitbull, I feel as though he’s fucking with my baby; pinning him under a streetcar named negative press.

Let me preface this angry rant with some back story here…

I fell in love with a dog named Daddy after watching countless episodes of National Geographic’s “The Dog Whisperer.” I found out that he is what’s called a “Staffordshire Terrier” also commonly known as the pit bull. On the show he was one of the most well balanced dogs, often accompanying Cesar as his partner in rehabilitating un-balanced dogs. And I decided I wanted one for Christmas. While I was researching the dog adoption process I couldn’t help but stumble upon a statistic that stated black male dogs were the most commonly euthanized dog. It’s so common that this phenomenon even has a name- the “Black Dog Syndrome.” Black coated dogs so rarely get adopted that most no-kill shelters don’t even try to save them because over the years they’ve realized that it’s pointless battle. Right then I knew exactly what I wanted for Christmas. I went on to the website www.petfinder.com and ran a search for pit bulls and their counterparts the American Staffordshire Terrier and found this guy…

Jackson's actual adoption photo

Jackson was everything I wanted — a black, male, pitbull mix (mixes are often healthier than full breeds), and with his one broken ear he was the cutest dog I had ever seen! Fortunately another person felt the same way and rescued him when he was five months old from the North Central pound the day before he was to be put to sleep. Since she couldn’t keep him she begged local rescue organization, Downtown Dog Rescue, to take this “little guy because he is such a gem and deserves a long, happy life.” Lori Weise the head of Downtown Dog Rescue, and now one of my favorite people, couldn’t resist his charms either and his life was spared. 4 months later I came along and adopted him.

Jackson on one of his beloved bike rides.

I had never owned a pit bull before, but from what I knew of any dog was that a good owner made for a great pet no matter the breed. I started working immediately to gain his respect. He is a “willful boy” as Aaron says, but if you’re strong and unwavering in your discipline he’ll roll over and give you all of his calm, submissive respect. Jackson’s only problem is that he tends to be what they call “leash aggressive,” which means when he meets or sees another dog while on the leash he’ll lunge or start barking at them. On my daily walks I see this behavior in many other dogs as well, and not just from the pit bulls. In fact, the most vicious behavior I’ve ever seen was from a shih tzu that lash out in violent rage when Jackson passed by. But unlike the shih tzu owner I don’t let my dog get away with bad behavior. Leash aggression is just one of the issues that “rescue dogs” commonly develop from their tumultuous lives. I correct his behavior over and over on the walks and plan on attending a Dog Aggression Seminar in August to learn more about what I can do to curb the outbreaks. (Information about the seminar can be obtained here www.downtowndogrescue.com

Recently the pit bull has come under negative fire from all directions with places like Kansas City, Denver, Colorado and Ontario, Canada placing bans on the breed! It makes my blood run cold to think about Kansas City’s, “amnesty period,” during which pit bull owners can turn their pets over for euthanization without facing a fine. I think Kansas City’s public officials should be euthanized instead — they are the truly dangerous killers.

And once again pit bulls are being discussed in the media now that Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick was charged with running a pit-bull fighting ring. Which brings me to the point of this whole rant…

I was shocked and extremely pissed-off to hear Geraldo “why-is-he-still-on-tv” Rivera bad mouthing and focusing more on the dogs then on the unacceptable behavior of Michael Vick! He went on the O’Reilly Factory and talked about how dangerous the pit bull breed is…

“If you like one of the animals you have to understand that after two centuries of breeding they are genetically predisposed to abnormal violence. That is the take on it. And there’s no dispute about that.”

Are you fucking kidding me!???? I have a dispute for you bitch.

And then he went on to chastise any and all pit bull owners…

“I’m a parent of five children. Anybody who has a pit bull around my kids is immediately shunned by me, because they are as if they are walking around with a weapon about to go off.”

Actually, that’s not too bad as I just found out that there is an extra perk to owning a pit bull — I won’t have to fear spending time around Geraldo and his (five!??) unfortunate offspring.

But to me, the worst thing that came spewing out of his ridiculous looking mouth was this…

“…if you have more than one pit bull it’s like having a crack pipe. There’s only one reason for it. It’s for sadistic reasons.”

Yes, I admit it. I’m a sadist. I adopted a second pit-bull with my best friend Amy so that I could watch them fight…

That brindle cutie is Maybelle, another dog adopted from Downtown Dog Rescue when we decided to find a friend for Jackson. I contacted Lori Weise again to see if she had any dogs that would fit the bill. She immediately told us about a dog who at the time was called “Little Mo” citing that “she is probably the best little Staffordshire Terrier I have ever had live here at my kennel. When I say not a moment of trouble, I totally mean it! This is a love of a dog, really gently, friendly with people and all dogs, and cool with the two cats in my office.” The little lady came to live with us and she is the most perfect dog I have ever met.

Little miss Maybelle.

Maybelle gets along with every living creature on earth. She co-exists today with Amy’s two friendly cats, my one temperamental cat, the ever-crazy Jackson, and about four rabbits when she goes to visit Amy’s parent’s house. An elephant wearing a coat of live mice could walk through the living room and Maybelle wouldn’t bat an eye. And she’s a “dreaded pit bull” Mr. Rivera! Imagine that if you’re feeble brain can handle the task.

If “reporter” Geraldo Rivera actually did some research he might have found out about a study by the American Temperament Test Society that showed that pit bulls do not deserve the bad rap they’ve been getting. A research group in Georgia has tested more than 25,000 dogs; measuring stability, shyness, aggressiveness, and friendliness in interaction with people. The New Yorker’s Malcolm Gladwell writes

“Eighty-four per cent of the pit bulls that have been given the test have passed [the temperament test], which ranks pit bulls ahead of beagles, Airedales, bearded collies, and all but one variety of dachshund.”

The president of the group even said pit bulls tested unusually well with children. An article on the study that features Lori Weise can be found here

So how can you, Mr Rivera and countless other shit-for-brained “reporters,” chastise a breed and an owner you obviously know nothing about. The only thing you got right was the part about comparing these dogs to crack. I am addicted to these guys for sure.

I’m addicted to their furry faces and their wet noses. I’m addicted the love that exists between me and them and the amazing energy that they project. I’m addicted to the way they live in the moment and enjoy everything that life has to offer. And yes I’m addicted to watching them fight because when they get too tired to stay on their toes they flop over on their sides together and just lick each others faces till their too tired to do even that. And you know what Mr Rivera, I plan on adopting more and more pit bulls until the day I die, because I have never known a more fun-loving, loyal and intelligent breed. All of which are qualities that you so obviously lack. jerk.

8 thoughts on “My furry crack pipe: Why Geraldo Rivera can fucking suck it

  1. K.J

    Power to the pople!You tell ’em girl! I have thown my entire being into 2 things- My litte girl, and Pitbull Awareness & Education. Maybe someday people will think outside of the box and stop being so ignorant! But until then, people like you and I can continue to reap the benefits of our ever so awesome “Crackipes”!

  2. Joe

    I love Jackson.

    Anyone who has a problem with that dog will have to answer to Uncle Joe.

    I hate Geraldo.

    I hope he gets eaten by a poodle.

    Pit bulls rule.

    Megan Tharpes rule.

    That's why I love them all.

  3. Billy

    Well….proof again that you are, by far, the most dramatic person I know!!

    Love you megs!

  4. Joe

    you will be pleased to know that the Atlanta Humane Society has begun using Michael Vick jerseys and t-shirts as pillows and liners for their dog kennels. rather appropriate, methinks.

  5. Frazier

    I, too, have a pit-bull who is the most loving animal I’ve ever owned. Soon, a brand new dog breed will arrive together to the media to blast, because they have accomplished rotties and dobies in previous years. Unfortunate that media sensationalism breeds so much inaccurate data.

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