Fuck you, give me a house!

the hottie house and hottie realtor

Whew. A LOT has been happening over this past week…

Remember when I asked the internet to help buy me a house? Well, the internet did help me… but not in the way I was asking. It was less “here’s some money from nowhere” and more “here’s how you put on your big girl panties and make an offer.”

A friend from college, who is now a mortgage broker, reached out to me and said, “let’s see what we can do!” Now, I had been down that road with him three years ago, and that road ended at Disappointmentville. Good news: You have been pre-approved for a loan. Bad news: It’s a loan that couldn’t even buy you a tiny-ass studio in LA.

Three years later, our situation has changed a bit…

Over the years, Aaron and I have both gotten raises, we’ve both gotten out of debt, and I’ve managed to save up some downpayment dough. Although I still wasn’t confident. Turns out, it’s good to have friends in the suit-wearing business world. Steve is a wizard, and hooked us up! We got approved for a loan that, combined with my downpayment money, means I could actually make a real offer on a real fucking house in a neighborhood that I’d actually want to live!!!!

Next step: Getting a real estate agent. Of course, I called up my friend Michael (or as my friends have been calling him, “hottie realtor“) and he sprung into action.

Since then, every time I get a call from Steve or Michael, I’m all…

And them I’m all…

I just feel like I’m going to barf, out both ends, at any given time. The nausea wakes me up super-early in the morning, and makes it difficult to eat, and work, and… you know… write this post. I’m calling it “first trimester home ownership.”

This Sunday, Hottie Realtor submitted my offer, along with this letter to the home owner…

I don’t know how else to put this, but… The first time I saw your house, it felt like my heart stopped. It was the exact same feeling I got when I set eyes on the first dog I adopted. Like our amazing, nine-year-old dog Jackson, there’s just something about your place that immediately felt like home, like part of the family.

We’re utterly in love with the quirky windows, the ceilings, that loft space, and, oh!, the fireplace! I heard you built that fireplace yourself — for that you are my hero — I feel like no home is complete without one. And then there’s that yard… ever since I’ve set foot on it, I’ve been fantasizing, every day, about the hours my husband and I will spend playing with our dogs in that yard.

In the days since I first saw the house, we’ve shared the listing with family and friends, who’ve all responded with, “that house is perfect for you, you should make an offer!” The things is, neither of us had ever made an offer on a home before. It felt like something so incredibly daunting, that we would never be able to pull it off. But the thought of letting your perfect home, and the life we could have in it, slip by without even trying, inspired me to finally make a move.

So, I’m writing you today in the hopes that you will choose our offer, knowing comes from a place of love and respect for the property. But also to let you know that your amazing home both inspired me, and taught me that I could accomplish something that we never thought I could do!

Thank you for both of those things.

From, The Finley family
Megan, Aaron, dogs Jackson and Peezu, and the cat Diego

And today I got the phone call — out of TWENTY FIVE offers, mine is one of the top four being considered!!!!

I’ll keep y’all updated. In the meantime, in a fit of excitement from being pre-qualified for a loan, I invented the #fuckyougivemeahouse hashtag, and I’m live-tweeting my news using that.

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8 Comments

  1. Those gifs are absolutely ON POINT. Buying a house is exactly those feelings. Good luck!!!

    • I asked a butt ton of people who have purchase (or are in the process of purchasing) a home, if that was normal. I got an overwhelming ABSOLUTELY YES. The solidarity makes me feel better.

  2. kristin

    I absolutely HATE buying and selling, and once we close on the house we are buying right now, I swear That Is It!
    Good luck!

  3. I have been keeping my gnarled fingers crossed for you ever since you first put this out into the exosphere. Let me know when I may unclench because I am determined to stay so until you win this lottery!

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