Category: media

Our “Honest Trailers” wedding invitation

I showed you our wedding highlight video the other day, but I totally forgot to show you the wedding invitation video that kicked it all off!

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What’s a TV geek without TV?: My experiment with not having cable

In my apartment reboot, one of the things that ate shit was my Dish TV. (Long story that involved not being able to close doors anymore due to my new floors being thicker than shitty apartment carpet.)

I was all too hasty in canceling my Dish subscription (sorry to the four people I left stranded without an HBOGO login on the night of the Game of Thrones finale!). My plan was to get ATT Uverse, but… turns out, the website lied, and Uverse isn’t available in my ‘hood (despite it being available 1 mile away!?). They can offer me DirecTV — but I’m not willing to sign a two year contract, because I’m not willing to admit that I’ll still be living in this same apartment in two years. And long ago I swore to NEVER get Time Warner Cable again.

Then I thought, ‘most of my friends have no cable TV whatsoever, maybe I could pull that off too? I’m young and hip… ish.’

So I got Amazon Fire TV, and challenged myself to live without cable TV.

It’s… not been going well.

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I’m consuming way too much Scottish pop culture

I'm consuming way too much Scottish pop culture

I ran out of shit to read, and it was these comments on an Offbeat Home post that convinced me to download Outlander. Which, okay, is written by a chick who lives in Arizona, but it’s FULL of Scottish history, and like, you know, one sexy-ass Scottish dude.

And then I finished watching all of Call the Midwife and Netflix recommended a show called Monarch of the Glen, and I’m all Scottish laird what now? It’s fucking AWESOME. It’s like Northern Exposure meets Downton Abbey… in Scotland… with a super-Megan-type actor. (Seriously, the moment Aaron saw this guy he was like “you have a crush on him, don’t you?) And I’m binge watching all seven fucking seasons.

Which means, at this point I’m up to my eyeballs in kilts, accents, and gorgeous scenery. And I’m asking my husband questions about the Finley lineage that he has no answers to. Only to say things like, “Yeah, I’ve been told we’re from Scotland.” “I think we have a family crest… something with an eagle?” “Look Megan, I don’t now, I don’t care, why am I even looking this shit up right now?”

My whole life I’ve wanted to go to Scotland, but, at this point I’m itching to visit Scotland. Like DY-ING. Aaron’s probably also itching to let me go to Scotland, if anything but to stop hearing me imitating the accent. “Aye, ye fucking wee mutts. Stop yer bloody yapping. I’ll get ye fed…”

This is all to say, if anyone wants to take a trip to Scotland sometime next year, I’d TOTALLY be down to go! Or who do I know that wants to play host to me in Scotland?

Welcome home to… a SWARM OF BEES!

I really want to re-edit this Zillow commercial to put all manner of HORRIBLE THINGS in the house after she opens the door:

I was thinking a gruesome murder scene, a bear fighting a T-Rex, or a Furry orgie. My friend Brittany suggested, “Like bees. A buttload of bees.” I laughed so hard I cried re-watching the commercial and imagining that one.

What else can we put behind the door? And who wants to make this edit happen for me?

Doctor Who is back and I’m EGGS-cited!

I’m so excited that I drank the champange (that my in-laws sent me for my 31st birthday) out of my Tardis coffee mug.

And then I went on to have many a Twitter conversations about the episode. [WARNING: spoilers]:

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Could Mars need TWO moms?

I’m currently watching Mars Needs Moms. I like to watch movies during dinner and it was the only thing starting when I sat down, so I thought, I can sit through anything, I’ll try this out.

It’s really bad. The movie is lame. And, clearly, the whole “Mom (read: the woman) is the only real parent” theme really bugs. (Long story short: Martian females aren’t very maternal therefor they kidnap good Earth mothers to steal their maternal essence and download them into “nanny bots.”) Why they don’t kidnap good Earth fathers too? It seems to be playing on the whole dads don’t parent they “babysit” stereotype.

But but-but-BUT, I was truly surprised at one moment in the film. Something that seemed far more open-minded then I would have expected from the movie…

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Is Twilight horribly anti-feminist. Or am I just crazy?

WARNING: the following post is about Twilight. I apologize in advance. I can’t believe I’m doing this, but I wrote it, I obviously have a strong opinion on the matter. So, therefor, why not post it. Feel free to totally ignore this post. Though, I have to say, I am curious about other takes on this subject. So if you DO read, I’d love your feedback…

is twilight horrible anti-feminist

I read the first Twilight book to find out what all the ruckus was about. I remember when Harry Potter was so popular that I decided to check it out and BOOM! Amazing books! Twilight, not-so-much. It read like a cheesy bodice-ripper (but without the bodice ripping). Sometimes cheesy bodice-rippers can be a harmless and fun waste of time. But cheesy bodice rippers with a clearly anti-feminist message that are marketed to young women, are a waste of time, yes. But harmless, they are not.

I know from the first book that the lead character, Bella, is described as almost being entirely nondescript! And I remember being startled by this. But beyond this and the fact that book is just filled with paragraph after paragraph of how beautiful Edward, the vampire is, I didn’t see much to get angry over. Of course I wasn’t taking it seriously, so I probably wasn’t paying attention.

Then last night I turned on the tv to find the movie New Moon had just started, so I thought, eh why not. At first I found the movie hilarious. The sappy, impossible lines being acted out so… sincerely (I guess) was just down-right amusing. But, after a while it started to make me angry.

As I watched a started to make a list of all the things that were beyond fucked up…

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Diamonds and demons

I HATE HOLIDAY JEWELRY COMMERCIALS!!!!

And now, because of Paul F Tompkins pointing this out last year, this commercial not only bugs, but freaks me out! Pay attention to the very end of this commercial and tell me that you don’t hear a dark and demonic voice singing, “every kiss begins with Kay.” …

Damn you Paul! This haunts me to my very core every time I hear it.

I don’t tolerate commercials very well.

I’m realizing that I have really strong opinions about commercials. Sometimes I wonder how ad people could get them so wrong. But mostly I wonder if anyone else feels the same way as I do. So, here we go! I’m going to be profiling venting about some of my most hated commercials and hoping that you guys will engage with me…

Pissing me off right now: the Toyota Highlander commercials

So, this little kid acting like an over-privileged asshole is supposed to make me, what? Want to buy this car so that other over-privileged asshole KIDS won’t think I’m “lame?” And, I’m sorry but, you “don’t tolerate dorkiness very well!?” You’re a CHILD! Basically, your job is “tolerate” a lot of stuff you don’t like until you grow the eff up. You’re lucky your parent’s “cart you around” at all in any kind of vehicle. [Insert “in my day” rant including snow covered hills and bare feet.] Hell, you’re lucky your parents have money to buy a vehicle at all after spending money on those trendy clothes that you got on there (that you’re just going to grow out of, you skinny-jeaned dick-head).

This, along with Kylie, the Windows 7 commercial toddler, are a constant reminder that it’s just not worth having children.

You should hear Aaron and I griping like old curmudgeons every time we see this commercial. So anyone else out there want to punch this kid in the face?

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